Lillehammer Norway   December 9-12, 2004

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I almost
learned to
skijump in
Norway.
Except that
(a) I landed
on my
backside
and (b) my
guide told

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Killing seal pups and whales isn't the only thing Norwegians
do well.
The country has great skiing and winter sports
facilities, too.
Lillehammer is a nice town (not a small dinky ski-resort shanty
village) and really easy to get to, just two hours by plane and a
further hour by train from Dublin -- about the same time it takes
to drive to Cork.
It gets dark early, so you have to make the most of every
second of sunlight.

Hafjell, Saturday, 2.09pm -- A crosscut from
blue to black. (Michael's picture)

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Closed, schmlosed -- there's no such thing as 'off-limits'
when you're insured up to the hilt. Michael and I took this
dodgy run -- there were trees sprouting up from the
unkempt snowdrifts -- on Saturday afternoon. We both
fell flat on our faces a couple of times. It was hilarious.

Preparing to walk on the wild side, Norwegian style
(minus the whole whale-killing thing)

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Friday was foggy on most of the mountain. Above the cloud/fogline, though, nearer the top, it was magical.
You could see for miles around before skiing down into the mist.
There was some racing going on, hardly surprising given Lillehammer staged the Olympics.

Michael and Asgeir watch the
slalom racing

Watching one of the downhill
slalom races near the top.
Michael and I raced when they
were finished. I came second.

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Guerillas in the mist

Ollie and Camilla ate and drank with us and
taught the beginners in our group (Gavin and
Brian).
Ollie used to be a ski-jumper until he broke his
back. These days he trains British Royal Marines
in skiing techniques and survival.
Camilla is a kindergarten teacher.

Ollie and Camilla. That lump under Ollie's upper lip is a
wedge of tobacco that Norwegians call snoose. It has five
times the nicotine levels of cigarettes and is banned in the
EU. But hey -- so is clubbing seals

The boys

Saturday, 10.45am: Asgeir and Michael get ready
for a day's skiing which would see jumps, crashes,
cuts and bruises

Gavin, rather ambitiously, tries to capture
the splendour with a cameraphone

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Brian and Ollie on a snowmobile -- Brian was a
beginner and needed a lift to see the top of the
mountain

Michael and I at the top

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Me, trying to beat the snowmobile -- from which this
picture was taken -- down the mountain

Afternoon light

The last bit of sun before our last
ski-run of the weekend. Michael took
this one, too.

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Bobsleigh

(I'm the one in the middle with one hand up)

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me he broke his back doing what
I'd done. After that, I confined the
Bond carry-on to runs down closed
trails.
I was at a resort called Hafjell in
Lillehammer, home of the 1994
winter Olympics. I was doing
important work for the paper,
writing a travel piece.
Aside from skiing, I inspected the
bobsleigh run (at 61mph), shot
rifles and drank until 3am in a bar
called Nikkers. This last activity
prompted an unfortunate remark
when I was asked by a female
skier as to what the plan was later
one evening: "I'll probably be in
Nikkers," I said.
"I'd say you will alright," was the tart
reply.
On the same trip were Brian
(Newstalk 106), Gavin (Directski),
Michael Collins (publisher and
editor of Abroad and Backpacker
magazines), Julian Bohan (Sunday
Independent) and Karla Elliott
(Sunday Independent) with her 6
year old daughter, Emily.
We had great local guides in Geir,
Asgeir, Ollie and Camilla.

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